What To Do If You’re Not Afraid to Fail—But Afraid to Succeed?

We talk a lot about fear of failure.
But what about the fear of success?

What do you do when you finally get the offer?
When the opportunity you’ve dreamed about is suddenly right there in front of you?
Do you question it? Celebrate it? Panic?
Or, if you’re like me, do you feel a strange mix of all three?

The Fear No One Talks About

I’ve always been someone who dreams big. But even as I work hard and put myself out there, I’ve noticed something creeping in: fear. Not of failing, but of succeeding.

Because success means change.
It means responsibility.
It means people might expect more from me.

I wonder:

What if it’s not everything I thought it would be?
What if I can’t live up to it?
What if this ruins the thing I love most—because now I have to monetize it?

I’ve realized that what I often fear isn’t the dream not coming true…
It’s what happens when it does.

It’s Not Just Me, Right?

I used to think I was the only one. But in quiet conversations with other creatives, I’ve learned I’m not alone.

The fear of success might not be universal, but it’s surprisingly common, especially among artists, performers, and anyone whose work is closely tied to their identity. When your dreams also have to pay your bills, the stakes feel even higher.

When the Dream Doesn’t Pay

A little while after graduating college, I was offered a theatre contract that would require me to move for a few months, paid very little, and required a lot of extra work. But it was a job! Which is what I thought I always wanted. It was the reason I did all this training. And yet…I hesitated. It didn’t pay enough to cover my living expenses. Taking the job meant picking passion over financial stability.

And I remember thinking:

“Is this even worth it if it pays less than my desk job?”
“Am I being stupid for saying yes to something that doesn’t ‘make sense’ financially?”

This is the uncomfortable truth:
Reaching for your dreams is often inconvenient.
And success, especially in creative fields, is messy, emotional, and rarely linear.

I didn’t end up taking the job. But that didn’t make me any less of an actor. Longevity requires balance. We can’t say yes to everything without burning out. And looking back, I don’t regret not taking that job. I think there can sometimes be a misunderstanding of our intuition and we have to ask ourselves, “Am I scared of the change this would require, or is this actually not worth the cost?”

Creatively Exhausted, Financially Stuck

I’ve always been a hard worker. The “star student.” The helpful team player. (eldest daughter trauma) I know how to show up and get the job done. But when I’m doing work that doesn’t serve me creatively, I feel drained, exhausted, and disconnected from myself.

Because at my core, I’m an artist.
And I want to live in my purpose.
But fear of change, of instability, of not getting it “right” keeps knocking at the door.

Here’s What I’m Learning

Success will challenge you.
It will stretch you.
It will require you to make peace with uncertainty.

But I also believe this:

The cost of staying stuck is far greater than the discomfort of growing.

We cannot let the fear of what might happen keep us from stepping into what could happen.
It’s okay to be scared.
It’s okay to take it one breath, one boundary, one brave “yes” at a time.

I’m sharing this because I’ve had to make a career decision that really made me battle with my fear of change and expectations that come with success. I’m thankful for my community of people who keep me in check when I’m feeling this way but I think in this industry when you often take long breaks in between jobs, it can feel like it’s a fluke or you’re not ready. But ask the deeper question. You don’t want to miss out on the abundance that the world is offering you.

If You’re Feeling This Too…

Know that you’re not weak for feeling fear.
You’re not ungrateful for questioning your dreams.
You’re human and you’re evolving.

And that’s exactly what growth is supposed to feel like.

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I write about the intersection of creativity, career, and real life especially for artists, creatives, and moms chasing their purpose.

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