Originally posted July 5, 2019
I just got an email from the Office of Alumni Relations about coming back to IWU for Homecoming to celebrate my ZERO YEAR REUNION… “Zero Year” is a weird way to say, “It’s too soon to come back but let’s celebrate anyway!” and the phrase doesn’t quite make sense. But it did get me thinking about how it’s been an entire 2 months since I walked across State Farm Hall steps and got my degree on May 5, 2019! Crazy! It’s all kind of gone by quickly and also in slow motion, similar to how it felt during my four years, but I can say that I’m so happy to have that degree and not have to do school anymore!
I’m honestly not a super sentimental person. I know I didn’t do everything to make my graduation super “special” or make sure I soaked in every moment with the people I’d grown to love over 4 years just right. The four years of work leading up to the one celebratory moment couldn’t be fit into one moment though. College was greater than a sum of it’s parts. It couldn’t be widdled down into a single moment of throwing our caps in the air (which only, like, three people did at our graduation! What was up with that?), but unending gratitude for my Alma Mater. I know. Cheesy, right? Did Wesleyan pay me to say this? No. I’m actually this full of gratitude.
Illinois Wesleyan School of Theatre Arts, I am so grateful to your program for selecting amazing and talented students to help grow and challenge me as an artist. The community of artists and learners is one of my favorite aspects of the program. The people are what make IWU… IWU! Faculty and students. Dedicating 4 years of your life somewhere that’s unfamiliar is difficult enough without people there to build you up and challenge you to grow the way you pay good money to do!
I’m grateful for the opportunities I had at IWU, even when the opportunities felt underappreciated. Even if it was just me who wasn’t appreciating them. I understand and am thankful for those opportunities now. I can honestly say that everything fell into place EXACTLY as it should have. IWU’s SoTA works so hard to make sure each opportunity it’s students receive is a building block meant to develop you into a greater artist. I’ll say, that for the first half of undergrad… I did NOT feel like I was receiving building blocks, more like Jenga Pieces that were being pulled to my demise. There came a turning point when I understood what was happening. Maybe that’s what graduation made me see more clearly. I could finally take a step back and look at my four years and know that it all made sense. It all worked for my good. I am SO thankful for that.
Lastly, (probably not lastly but I’m trying to wrap this up neatly with a pretty bow), is the network. And I don’t mean the network in a skeevy, “I got connections 😉 …” sort of way, or even the monotone and lifeless means of a “network.” There is a phenomenal resource of Wesleyan Alumni who are smart and friendly and want to be helpful to you. I’m so blessed and honored to feel safe with a network of these wonderful people and I will never be able to express that enough.
Before I wrap this up, I wanted to share some words of wisdom (if you dare call them that) with my SoTA friends at Wesleyan aspiring to get that degree in the next few years!!!
1. If it’s not the role/position/class/teacher you originally wanted…. GOOD. This is the time for optimal growth. The more it feels like bullshit, the more opportunity for growth. Don’t get me wrong, if something is unethical or harming you I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about moments when you feel like you deserved better. The moment you begin to think you were owed a “bigger part” or a more interesting class or a better teacher is an EXCELLENT time to hop off the high horse and get your hands messy. How are you going to deal with this situation? Complain to all your friends about how you deserve better OR prove that you deserve better by working your butt off and keeping your mouth shut? I know it’s so hard and I definitely failed at this so many times, but it’s something I wish I had practiced better in school. Honestly, this advice applies in many areas of life. DO HARD THINGS! It’s GOOD FOR YOU!
2. You have plenty of time. Don’t squander it. But don’t take it all so seriously. College may feel like “getting the A” is the goal but that A+ doesn’t mean you grew the most. A+ doesn’t “Most Improved” or even “MVP”. (I wish those were options for grades in classes for artists… I think those 2 things should be recognized when it comes to the arts just like they are in sports!) I also know that college is a WHIRLWIND and that at IWU, you’re not just taking arts based classes and GenEd courses have requirements that seem to conflict with ~*theatre stuff*~ but, there is plenty of time to make it work. Prioritize yourself and your growth and you’ll have time. There isn’t always time to be A+ perfect, so, don’t let that be the goal. Take it from the A-/B+ QUEEN… There’s always enough time to be “Most Improved” and “MVP”, so make that the goal.
3. You are an artist. You don’t always feel like an artist as a student, but you are. Treat yourself like one. Take every opportunity you can to be an artist. Do art with your friends now because you have the space and resources to do so. Let your friends challenge you. You will be better for it. Remember what you came to school to do and do it together.
Jessica Tanner 